Lunch Break

Sampling dishes and diners in and around Miami County 

Good Advice Comes With Rice 

Anthony Bourdain was once asked what the cure to a hangover was. He boldly claimed that aspirin, a cold Coca-Cola, and spicy Szechuan food would do the trick. Although I didn’t have a hangover, nor did I have a Coke, I had Szechuan adjacent food, a hungry group of friends, and I’d been listening to an audiobook narrated by Tony himself. So, in the spirit of Bourdain’s recommendations, I found myself at the quaint, railroad-side Asian Bistro, He5. 

He5’s exterior directly matches what you see when you walk in the door. A tiny, quiet, and quaint Asian restaurant, with cute decorations of red and gold dragons, inspirational quotes, yellow walls, and diner booths. Although I think it’d be the perfect spot to gossip for hours over General Tso’s Chicken. I opted for carryout and a gossip session in my friend's studio apartment. 

The thing about ordering carryout for a group is that you order a lot of it. I really enjoyed that I could use the He5 website to my advantage. There were so many exciting options, I ended up ordering way too much food for five people. I was pleasantly surprised when I could apply free fried bread to my order over $30. That’s an amazing deal that is usually exclusive to Domino’s or Little Caesars. 

The bread was fluffy, greasy, and sugar-coated, and one of the last, tastiest things I ate out of the abundance of food. First, I started with the Crab Rangoon. It was a short drive from He5 to the apartment, but a drive with a hot, steamy bag, nonetheless. To my delight, the Rangoon was so perfectly fried that its crunchiness withstood the sweaty bag and Ohio heat wave. I also dove into the fried dumplings, General Tso’s chicken, chicken fried rice, and pork lo mein. 

The pork lo mein was a fan favorite. Comments were made that shouldn’t be repeated about bodily functions that could arise with each bite. It was just that good. My personal favorite was the General Tso’s. Not too spicy, but not disgustingly sweet. A perfectly medley of sauce and chewy chicken, that melted in my mouth. We ended up full to the brim, with leftovers, and about 15 fortune cookies to unwrap. Although I took my one, I have a theory that if you read more than one fortune cookie, none of them are true. It’s up there with my theory that throwing pennies away while cleaning out your car will cause you to have a financial loss in the future.

My one and only fortune said, “Family gatherings are a time of love and togetherness.” I felt jipped for a second, since I was clearly not with family and had no reunions planned in the near future. Then I thought about it some more and decided that if two people talking about God is church, then a few friends spilling secrets over Asian food might just be family. 

In summary, I wasn’t in need of a hair of the dog, and I didn't have a cold Coke. However, I took someone’s advice and ended up having a great meal with great people. So, take my advice, and eat at or from He5 Asian Bistro. 

He5 Asian Bistro, 121 East Staunton Road, Troy